How do you deal with bullying and humiliation on social media?

By Burnett Munthali

On Friday April 19, 2024, Malawian public figure Dorothy Shonga also known as ‘Cash Madam’ dragged to court an active socialite Esther Gondwe over defamation posts.

Dorothy who is married to Malawis’ renowned Amapiano artist Zeze Kingston summoned Gondwe claiming that she has been attacking her through Facebook posts.

In a summon letter dated  April 18, 2024 that has leaked, Dorothy is accusing Gondwe for describing her as a porn star and bankrupt person.


Social media bullying is the process of purchasing ad placements ads for clients.

It involves paying to display sponsored content, such as advertisements, promoted posts, or sponsored videos, to a targeted audience on platforms like Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, LinkedIn, and others.

Bullying that happens on social media is just as harmful as other bullying and sometimes it is even worse. That’s because it is hard to get away from and it can reach people no matter where they are or what they are doing.

Cash Madam Dorothy

What can you do if you are being bullied online?

Getting bullied on social media or through text messaging can feel really terrible.

Being connected to your phone, tablet, or computer all the time means that a bully can sneak into your life and make it feel like there’s no safe place to be. But there are things you can do to stop online bullying.

Change your privacy settings. Make sure that all of your social media accounts have very strict privacy settings. Set your accounts to “friends only” or “private.”

Block and un-friend. Block any harassing accounts, email addresses, or phone numbers.

Keep your personal details private. Don’t post your home address, phone number, school name, or any other personal information about yourself.

Take a break from your phone or computer. If it feels like the online bullying just won’t stop, take a break from social media. Turn off your phone or put it out of your sight.

Save harassing emails, texts, or messages. Take screenshots of harassment. This can be important evidence down the line.

Report bullying where it happens. Report online abuse to Facebook or Twitter if you’re bullied on those platforms. You can report to other site admins if you’re bullied on their sites.

Tell an adult that you trust. Talk with a parent, teacher, coach, counselor, or someone who can be supportive. Adults can only help if they know about the problem.

Don’t respond to mean or threatening messages. This can make bullying worse.  Also, you could get in trouble if you make threats back.

Report serious threats to the police. If someone threatens your safety or shares sexual pictures or video of you, report it to the police immediately.

It may be hard to care about a bully’s feelings, but people who bully are often in pain and insecure about themselves. So they’re unfairly taking their bad feelings out on you.

It isn’t right, but it might help to remember that their mean actions are not about you. Their bullying is about their own insecurities. You’re valuable.

You are important to this world. And no matter what anyone might say, you didn’t do anything to deserve this.

Esther Gondwe

What to do when someone publicly humiliates you on social media?

First, be cool. If that “someone’s ” intention is to humiliate you, then don’t let him win by getting caught into it. Never try to argue,correct, accept or deny anything at all. Get out of the center of attention as soon as you can.

Second, Having trusted people you can turn to for support and reassurance can help you cope with even the most spiteful and damaging experiences of cyberbullying.

Reach out to connect with family and real friends or explore ways of making new friends.

There are plenty of people who love and appreciate you for who you are.

Third, Responding when we are upset can make things worse. (Standing up to a bully can be effective sometimes, but it’s more likely to provoke the person and escalate the situation.) Taking a break gives the power back to you!

Finally, in general, there are two possible reasons why the person is doing this.

First of all, it can just be their intention to make the other person feel bad, for instance, because they plainly dislike the other person or because they want to retaliate for an earlier wrongdoing.

Individuals who have been subjected to the most severe and public of humiliations frequently experience feelings of hopelessness and helplessness.

Lacking the ability to make effective appeals on their own behalf, they have no discernible way back, no avenue to recover and have a better future.